Athelstan panics for a brief moment when Ragnar's hand slips from his, but the touch that followed has the panic subsiding quickly. He leans into the gentle touch, watching Ragnar's face even as he's still talking. When Ragnar replies, Athelstan's eyes drop because it's hard to believe. Athelstan feels like there are so many things he's not good at, or not good enough at that he may never become better at. Not just sex, other things as well.

He'll always be torn between two worlds, two beliefs even though he is held together by his love for Ragnar in a way. He wishes that he could fully commit to Ragnar's ways as much as he could commit to Ragnar. He looked back up at Ragnar at the question, but he isn't really looking at him as he spoke.

The question confuses him for a moment. "It's different, isn't it?" he questions, and he feels he's done or said something wrong. "When I say sex I mean," he wanted to say 'you know what I mean' but clearly Ragnar did not.

"You have never been inside me," the words were flustering to say and he looks down at his hands that are once again clasped tight in his lap. "I love what we've done together, Ragnar," he says sincerely then, confused. "But I can't understand why you do not want to be with me that way. Haven't you with..." he cut himself off there.